"Out of the frying pan, and into the fire"
I think it is an apt description to what I'm in for. Each time I tell myself that today will be different, it just ends up the same, with me being irritated by the kids.
It's not that I even like the job, to be frank. I'll do my work and I get paid, that's a good combination.
Anyway, I keep telling myself that this week will be the last I see of them before I go for an "extended vacation". In some ways, I am thrilled to drop what I am doing now and embark on a new journey, a "real" job, some may say.
On the other hand, like that idiom suggests, it's not as if I'm really in for something big. It's a graded job with me being kept on my toes all the time. I really hope to be at least happy in it.
Now that I'll be gone, I won't say I'll miss those ickle children. I don't necessary like my position now because they keep asking me for help and what not. I don't think I am up to the job of being a patient person.
Due to this week being my last week working during the weekdays, I will try to be extra tolerant and giving. They always say, be at your best when it's your last. Sighs. However, I've signed myself up for Saturdays and you know that Saturdays are always the worst.
Why? It is because that is almost no ending time. At least on weekdays, by 10 plus, we'll be packing and getting ready to leave. But on Saturdays, if there are other matters to do, it means we have to stay back, unless I pull a fast one and balk. Obviously, I can't do that everytime. It makes my credibility go down and god know that I'm extremely pliant, most of the time.
My feelings on this? It's mixed, to be sure. I love the idea of not reporting to this job but it just means I have to report on the other job. I'm not happy, just numb, like always.
We do not exist for ourselves. When we are young, we exist for school, it is all for the future, they say. If you want to be successful when you grow up, you have to slave in school.
When that future comes along, you exist purely for work; your boss and your company. You slave even more, towards that bright light at the end of the tunnel. You want material things in life to make your future substantial.
There's almost no time to relax, to take a step back and exclaimed, this is not what I want.
But, I guess what is even more frightening is to really find out that what you are doing for, it's all for naught. Perhaps, you have seen the light and decided that worldly things don't matter anymore. Perhaps, it's better late than never.
But to start over, it's just plain discouraging and taxing.
