Saturday, November 19, 2011

SOS

After 13 years, you would have thought I'd wisen up. But no, humans are weird in this way. We never seem to learn, did we?

Once again, I find myself not having enough time to study and this year, it's even worse than usual. For one, it's University. Need I say more? It's really a killer and I am seriously demoralised by everything. If only I could weep and things will be fine like magic.

3 examinations in 2 days is no laughing matter and with how my brains work, I can't really cope with the influx of info. Action speaks louder than words right? I keep telling myself to work hard but somehow I didn't. I need a wake-up call and what better than one in the form of bad results.

I am not giving up but rather, I am trying to lessen the shame of scoring bad grades. Everyday, I give myself a prep-talk, I have to condition my mind in accepting what will be less-than-stellar grades. I keep telling myself that it's alright for this is the first time. I try to lessen the burden I will otherwise face.

All I am asking for are B- for all subjects. I can't fail. I can't get C or D. I really cannot afford that.

I've never had such hard-core examinations since the O levels. On one hand, I feel sorry for myself. On the other, I know that I am the one who put myself in such a spot.